Breaking Free from Conditioning

Breaking Free from Conditioning Customs, culture, religion or propensities; anything that is blindly accepted can be an obstacle in building up basic reasoning or a free reasoning society.

Unconsciously, we have become cogs in a machine that turns based on the thoughts of others. We do as we are told, as our parents were told and as their parents were told. It’s time we make our own choices, it’s time we break the loop.

Today’s youngsters will be tomorrow’s adults. Will they create a better tomorrow if they receive an education that highlights superficial values? We need to encourage curiosity and teach them to question everything. It is imperative that children understand their social responsibility and develop their creative capacity.

In the context of current day society, which is not very flexible, students more often than not, tend to walk into career paths that society deems fit, without being given the opportunity to identify and select their own path. Technical fields are given more respect than creative fields. Children are taught that artistic fields like painting and films aren’t beneficial professions. These restrictions undermine the creative capacity of every individual, discouraging their confidence in their own talents.

Social moulding can be an obstacle in character advancement, but we should no longer blame our past generations for making us who we are. We need to create a change. We need to open up our own minds so that we can nurture the humans of tomorrow to develop their own talents, so as to believe in their own creativity and capability.

Teaching children to live out their own choices will help encourage the idea of individuality. Being different is not bad. Set them free from society’s conditioning and encourage them to think on their own. They should be empowered to read books and watch movies while knowing that the opinions stated are subjective. That rights and wrongs are not clearly defined.

Help them expand their understanding, widen their horizons, enjoy their interests and enhance their creativity. Show them how to open new doors instead of reusing the old ones. Tell them that the future is not defined and that new and better choices can help create a better tomorrow. Do not let your child become a victim of conditioning.

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HAPPY TEACHERS’ DAY!!

Teachers Day is celebrated on September 5th in India and is a day to express the love and gratitude we feel towards those who have taught us in life, from school teachers to college professors to our tutors or trainers in fields other than academics.


On this teacher’s day, HOL brings to you reasons as to why teachers are the real heroes: – –

Teachers follow students through each pivotal stage of development.
 #From six to eight hours a day, five days a week, you as a teacher are poised to become one of the most influential person in your students’ life.


#After their parents, children first learn from you, their elementary school teacher.


#Then, as a middle school teacher, you guide students through yet another important transition: adolescence.


 #As children become young adults, learning throughout middle school and into high school, you answer their questions, listen to their problems and teach them about this new phase of their lives.


#You not only watch your students grow, you help them grow.


#Teachers are founts of experience.


#They have already been where their students are going, undergone what they will go through and are in a position to pass along lessons, not only regarding subject matter, but lessons on life.


We hope you will agree, we all are trained for curriculum, class transactions, to communicate professionally, still there are many other necessary elements i.e the personal warmth, personal bond, willingness to remain down to the kid’s level, which are important to make learning a joyful journey for children forever.
Happy Teachers Day!

Disha-The Resourceful Direction

We’re taught that we need to somehow control our kids, so we often jump in their box without a second thought. We think we’re supposed to motivate our children to want certain things in life, but that only causes them to function in reaction to you. Your child might comply to get you off his back or even to please you, but that doesn’t help him get self-motivated. Again, you definitely want to inspire and influence your child. The goal is the same: we want our kids to be motivated—it’s how we get there that makes the difference.

Ask yourself these questions:

• Does your worry compel you to nag, hover, push, cajole, or over-function for your child?

• Does your frustration cause you to yell, scream, beg, punish, and throw your hands up in despair?

• Does your helplessness cause you to start fighting with your spouse, who never seems to do as much as you think he or she should do to get your child motivated?

• Does your fear about your child’s underachieving cause you to keep trying to get him to change and to be more motivated?

If you find yourself doing any of the above, you’ve probably seen your child resist, comply to get you off his back, rebel, or dig in his heels harder. Let me be clear: Whether he fights you or goes along with what you want, the end result is that he will be no more motivated than he was before. You might eventually get him to do what you want, but your goal of helping him be selfmotivated is still a far away reality.

How do you inspire your kids to motivate themselves? (Here are a few tips to help you influence them towards self-motivation.)

1. Don’t let your anxiety push them to get motivated. You will only motivate them to resist you or to comply to calm you down because they want you to leave them alone. This won’t motivate them as much as teaching them how to appease or resist you. It then becomes about reacting to you instead of focusing on themselves and finding some internal motivation. Your anxiety and need for them to care will just create a power struggle between you and your child.

2. Be inspiring. The only way to motivate is to stop trying to motivate. Instead, work towards inspiring your child. How do you do that? Be an inspiring person. Ask yourself if your behaviors are inspiring or controlling. Understand that your kids will want to run the other way if you’re too controlling. Think about someone in your own life who is inspiring to you, and work towards that goal. Remember, the only thing you’ll motivate if you’re pushing your child is the motivation to resist you.

3. Let your child make his own choices—and face the consequences. Let your child make his own choices. When it’s a poor choice, hold him accountable by letting him face the consequences that come with it. If the consequence of not doing his homework is that the computer is taken away, put the need to get that computer time back in his hands. If he finishes his work, he gets the time on the computer you’ve agreed upon. That will be a motivation for him in the right direction without you telling him what to do, how to do it, and lecturing him on why he should care. As a parent, what you’re actually doing is asking yourself, “What will I put up with? What are my values and principles?” and you’re sticking to them.

4. Ask yourself these questions:

• What motivates my child?

• What does he really want?

• What questions can I ask that will help him discover and explore his interests?

• What are his goals and ambitions?

Step far enough away to see your child as a separate person. Then observe what you see. Talk to him to find the answers to the questions above. And then listen—not to what you want the answers to be, but to what your child is saying. Just listen to him. Respect his answers, even if you disagree.

5. Choose which door you want to enter. Imagine two doors. Door number one is for the parent who wants to get their kids motivated and do the right thing in life: Get up, go to school, get their work done, be successful. Door number two is for parents who want their kids to be self- motivated to do those things. They want to influence their child to work toward the things they’re interested in. To not only do the right thing but to want to do the right things. Which door would you enter? If it’s door number one, then the way to achieve that goal is push, punish, beg, nag, bribe, reward, and cajole. If you decide on door number two, then you’ll reach that goal by asking different kinds of questions. Rather than, “Did you get your homework done?” you might say, “Why did you decide to do your homework today and not yesterday? I noticed you chose not to do geometry yesterday, but you’re doing your history homework today. What’s the difference?” Be an investigator, exploring and uncovering, helping your child discover his own motivations and sticking points.

6. It’s not your fault. Remember, your child’s lack of motivation is not your fault, so don’t personalize it. When you do this, you may actually contribute to the underachieving by creating more resistance.

Look at it this way. If you look too closely in the mirror, you can’t really see yourself—it’s just a blur. But when you get farther away, you actually see yourself more clearly. Do the same thing with your child. Sometimes we’re just so close, so enmeshed, that we just can’t see them as separate from us. But if you can stand back far enough, you can actually start to see your child as his own person and start to find out what makes him tick—and then you’ll be able to help him understand himself as well. When you step back and observe, you’ll know what works for him, why he’s reaching for certain things and what really gets him moving. There will be things he’s never going to be motivated to do but is still required to them. He may hate doing his chores and try to get out of it, and that’s when you give him consequences.

The goal is to influence your child when he has to do something he doesn’t want to do, and get to know him well enough to figure out what his own desires might be. As a parent, you want to strengthen his skills in defining what’s important to him. You want to help your child define for himself who he is, what’s important to him and what he’s going to do to make those things happen. Our responsibility is to help our kids do that, not to do it for them. We need to stay out of their way enough so they can figure out who they are, what they think and where their own interests lie.

Contact us on: https://wa.me/+918470074801/05 or call us at: +918470074801/05

INSIGHTS WITH SONAL

A major goal of schooling is to prepare students for flexible adaptation to new problems and settings. Students’ abilities to transfer what they have learned to new situations provides an important index of adaptive, flexible learning; seeing how well they do this can help educators evaluate and improve their instruction. Many approaches to instruction look equivalent when the only measure of learning is memory for facts that were specifically presented. Instructional differences become more apparent when evaluated from the perspective of how well the learning transfers to new problems and settings. Transfer can be explored at a variety of levels, including transfer from one set of concepts to another, one school subject to another, one year of school to another, and across school and every day, nonschool activities.
People’s ability to transfer what they have learned depends upon a number of factors:


* People must achieve a threshold of initial learning that is sufficient to support transfer. This obvious point is often overlooked and can lead to erroneous conclusions about the effectiveness of various instructional approaches. It takes time to learn complex subject matter, and assessments of transfer must take into account the degree to which original learning with understanding was accomplished.


* Spending a lot of time (“time on task”) in and of itself is not sufficient to ensure effective learning. Practice and getting familiar with subject matter take time, but most important is how people use their time while learning. Concepts such as “deliberate practice” emphasize the importance of helping students monitor their learning so that they seek feedback and actively evaluate their strategies and current levels of understanding. Such activities are very different from simply reading and rereading a text.

* Learning with understanding is more likely to promote transfer than simply memorizing information from a text or a lecture. Many classroom activities stress the importance of memorization over learning with understanding. Many, as well, focus on facts and details rather than larger themes of causes and consequences of events. The shortfalls of these
approaches are not apparent if the only test of learning involves tests of memory, but when the transfer of learning is measured, the advantages of learning with understanding are likely to be revealed.


* Knowledge that is taught in a variety of contexts is more likely to support flexible transfer than knowledge that is taught in a single context. Information can become “context-bound” when taught with context-specific examples. When material is taught in multiple contexts, people are more likely to extract the relevant features of the concepts and develop a more flexible representation of knowledge that can be used more generally.


* Students develop flexible understanding of when, where, why, and how to use their knowledge to solve new problems if they learn how to extract underlying themes and principles from their learning exercises. Understanding how and when to put knowledge to use—known as conditions of applicability—is an important characteristic of expertise.
Learning in multiple contexts most likely affects this aspect of transfer.


* Transfer of learning is an active process. Learning and transfer should not be evaluated by “one-shot” tests of transfer. An alternative assessment approach is to consider how learning affects subsequent learning, such as increased speed of learning in a new domain. Often, evidence for positive transfer does not appear until people have had a chance to learn about the new domain—and then transfer occurs and is evident in the learner’s ability to grasp the new information more quickly.

*All learning involves transfer from previous experiences. Even initial learning involves transfer that is based on previous experiences and prior knowledge. Transfer is not simply something that may or may not appear after initial learning has occurred. For example, knowledge relevant to a particular task may not automatically be activated by learners and may not serve as a source of positive transfer for learning new information. Effective teachers attempt to support positive transfer by actively identifying the strengths that students bring to a learning situation and building on them, thereby building bridges between students’ knowledge and the learning objectives set out by the teacher.

*Sometimes the knowledge that people bring to a new situation impedes subsequent learning because it guides thinking in wrong directions.For example, young children’s knowledge of everyday counting-based arithmetic can make it difficult for them to deal with rational numbers (a larger number in the numerator of a fraction does not mean the same thing as a larger number in the denominator); assumptions based on everyday physical experiences can make it difficult for students to understand physics concepts (they think a rock falls faster than a leaf because everyday experiences include other variables, such as resistance, that are not present in the vacuum conditions that physicists study), and so forth. In these kinds of situations, teachers must help students change their original conceptions
rather than simply use the misconceptions as a basis for further understanding or leaving new material unconnected to current understanding.

Ms. Sonal Ahuja at IDA connect conference

Ms.Sonal Ahuja, Educational Alchemist and Founder, House of Learning recently attended an IDA Connect Conference on ‘Developing Mindsets for STEM Education along with various other education trainers and K12 principals.

The conference stressed upon the fact that stem learning is the new dawn for this age of learning. It is incredibly inclusive and discipline-based and takes into consideration the ever changing, dynamic roles of teachers in student-centered classrooms and the various pedagogical approaches it brings in.

STEM curriculum is aligned with its relevance and its effectiveness with employability and future jobs, making it relevant as well as current, the two basics needed for assured success.

The conference also concentrated upon experiential learning which has the ability to shift the paradigm towards an intrinsic understanding of science and technology and in turn offer solutions to real-world problems.

It was also noted that mathematics, as a core subject, is integrally mandatory to learning and that mathematical models can be applied to teach other disciplines of learning as well.

Sonal believes that anything is possible. Taking an example of an old building which needs renovation every now and then, she says “It would always be a better idea to demolish the whole building and build it again instead of wasting precious time and energy trying to salvage its scraps. In the same way, we need to start from the beginning for our teaching methods and build a more organised and well-built system.”

Insights with Sonal

In my daily life, my profession makes me come across many individuals, one such occasion was the workshops that I recently conducted at Amity International Schools with regards to the emotional and social well-being of educators and facilitators as well the importance of time and stress management for them.

I know what you’re thinking… “What in the world does THAT have to do with how I manage my time?” The truth is, so much of managing your time is about managing your energy. And while physical energy is important, your mental and emotional energy is also essential in giving you the motivation and clarity to work on the tasks that will give you the greatest sense of accomplishment.

The term “emotional intelligence” first appeared in 1964 in a paper written by Michael Beldoch. It was in 1995, however, that the concept became better known due to a book on the topic written by Daniel Goleman. Dr. Travis Bradberry has a fantastic book on emotional intelligence as well, entitled Emotional Intelligence 2.0.

Simply defined, emotional intelligence is the capacity to be aware of, control, and express one’s emotions.

If I were to ask you about your best technique to wisely manage your time, you would probably share a routine you follow at work or home. You might start listing tactics like “Do the hardest task early in the day,” or “Only check emails three times a day.” I’d be willing to wager you wouldn’t say, “I manage my emotions well.”

If you’re looking for a fresh strategy for managing your time more effectively, consider how well you are doing in these four areas of emotional intelligence:

Self-Awareness

The focus here is on recognizing and understanding your moods, emotions, and what drives you. Do you notice how different tasks impact your desire to work on the next item in your day? When possible, do you plan your day by alternating activities that add or take away your mental or emotional energy? And do you reflect on the larger purpose for which you are completing your tasks? Checking off 37 things may give your brain quick shots of endorphin, but it doesn’t necessarily mean you’re getting your most important things done-which is the whole reason to manage your time well.

Self-Management

Ever looked at the next item in your day and felt overwhelmed or anxious? Here’s the bigger question: How did you handle the impulse to work on something else? Self-management is all about recognizing disruptive impulses and controlling them. So instead of choosing to check your email to avoid a difficult task, you choose to break down the task into more manageable steps. Or you remind yourself of more difficult tasks you’ve undertaken lately at which you were successful to gain more confidence.

Social Awareness

For this area, think empathy. How good are you at recognizing the emotions of other people? If your job requires you to make requests of other people to get your work done (and most do), do you stop and reflect on how the request will make them feel? Most importantly, does that knowledge or insight change the way you frame the request? We’ve all experienced a leader or supervisor who seemed to be blind (or unconcerned) to our emotional state, and how it impacted our motivation to accept the task and/or complete it well.

Relationship Management

For leaders and managers who want to use their time well, this area of emotional intelligence is critical. Your best work comes from the full engagement of every team member. And the only way you can get that level of engagement is to know how to communicate with them in a way that connects with them on both a mental and emotional level.

This workshop was not only an enriching and learning experience for me but also a rejuvenating and revitalizing experience for the faculty and staff of Amity International Schools.

So, if you’re looking to take your time management skills to the next level, maybe you should stop trying to figure out how to squeeze another hour out of your day. Start spending a little more time reflecting on how your emotions are increasing or decreasing the energy you need to get the right work done.

#HouseOfLearning #SonalAhuja #TimeManagement #StressManagement#EmotionalIntelligence #AmityInternationalSchools#ProfessionalDevelopmentProgram #TeacherTrainingProgram#AmitySchools #EmotionManagement #TeamManagement#SelfManagement #SelfAwareness

Sonal Ahuja Amity International School Noida

Apna Time Aayega

House of Learning (HOL), under the guidance of Mr. Chanderjit Devgan , Secretary, Delhi Legal Services Authority(DLSA) and Sonal Ahuja, the Founder of HOL and an “Educational Alchemist” took up a task for rehabilitation of juveniles, titled Apna Time Aayega. She assumed a noteworthy job in sharpening the specialists to allow this undertaking as it was structured remembering the long haul change in the nervous system science of these kids. The truly necessary activity for their better future and to likewise to help the nation is to sharpen them enough with the goal that they can add to the prosperity of themselves and the general public. Sonal united individuals from varied backgrounds to add to this undertaking. From Corporate trainers, doctors, pilots, NLP experts, chartered accountants, everyone was needed to play their part to make this project successful.

The Key participants in the project were: Sonal Ahuja, Founder HOL, an early childhood education expert as well as a child and educational psychology diploma holder. She spearheaded the project. Priyanka Gulati, Principal of a reputed school of East Delhi is an NLP practitioner and a Certified International Workshop ‘Heal Your Life’ Leader. Susha P Roy has 14 years of work experience in the corporate world and in the print media. She has been working as a School counselor since 2005.

Pallavi has been in the education field for many years, currently she is working with DAV school. Sahil Verma has been a passionate content developer for the past 8 years and is currently working with Value 360 Communications, one of India’s leading and award-winning PR agencies. Gp Capt (Retd) Arvind Tripathi, served with the IAF for 27 years and now is a commercial pilot for Indigo Airlines. Chandrika is an Excellence Installation Specialist, Strategic Intervention Life Coach & a Soft Skill Trainer since 2016. Disha is a Chartered Accountant and a change-expert, NLP Master Practitioner and Excellence Installation Specialist. Prof. (Dr) Smita Manjavkar is an MBBS, MD Medicine, Professor, Dept. Of Medicine, HIMSR & HAHC Hospital with 17 years of teaching experience.

The project was divided into 4 stages to provide a better experience and consecutive results.


Stage 1 was the Diagnosis to understand what’s happening in their life, their circumstances, and the reasons of their choices. Getting into their life cycles and understanding, empathizing and listening to them for every individual took 2-3 hours.

We call it ATC. Adjustments x Time= Consequences.

In this stage, a great rapport was built between the children and team, each child opened up further about their circumstances and hardships, providing an insight into their lives for us.

All teenagers take stupid risks that they one day look back on and wonder what they were thinking. But studies have found it is not because teens aren’t thinking about the risks involved—it’s because they think about them longer than adults.

Yes, that’s counter-intuitive. But think of it like this: If you are on a diet and see a piece of yummy chocolate cake, are you more likely to eat it if you just glance at it, remember you are trying to eat healthy, and walk away, or if you sit there and mull over the pros and cons of eating it? The latter, obviously.

It’s the same with the teen brain. Our brains take a lot longer to fully form than was previously thought. In teens, the frontal lobe (where our decision making happens) is not as connected to the rest of the brain as it is later in life. This means teens literally cannot come to a decision as fast as an adult. Teens take an average of 170 milliseconds longer to go over the consequences of a decision, which in turn makes them more likely to decide the risk is worth it.

Stage 2 was the Creation of a to-do list for thriving eco system to support better neurology. By understanding the psychology of each child, the team could chalk out more personal plans of action and cater to each child’s need separately better. Adding friends to the mix, makes it even harder for teens to avoid taking risks.

Adults wonder why their kids’ friends can influence them so much. That’s because once you are an adult, your brain has quite literally grown out of it.

This means that teens, when spending that tiny bit of extra time deciding what choice to make, are also fighting against the overwhelming internal drive that tells us to do things that feel good. As the brain develops in adulthood, however, that connection ends and we end up getting no extra good feeling from taking risks in front of our friends.

Stage 3 was Rigorous research work and conversational programming done using scientific procedures and metaphors for individual assessment. We were met with objections, but we left no stone unturned to remove these and brought them to the state that they wanted us to be with them for longer even after the completion of project. This stage checked resilience of both parties. Theirs and ours too. It was the most challenging stage. While teens may look more like adults than kids, to a neuroscientist their brains resemble a child’s. That’s part of the reason teens suddenly starts acting like toddlers again around age 14. While their bodies are aging, their brain is rearranging itself in a way that temporarily makes it act the same way it did when they were younger.

But if you are in your twenties and have been feeling cocky up until this point, it’s important to note that this chaotic brain makeup doesn’t completely settle down until your early thirties.

Stage 4 was to assess the will power of the children in being resourceful and capability to take better decisions in the future. Final stage was full integration stage. Reflections, sharing, open commitments, readiness, promises, love, care, self-improvement, resilience, all were seen in this stage. If teens seem to not care about other people’s feelings or seem to flip out over nothing, it might not be because they are drama queens. Studies have found that teens have a much harder time correctly interpreting vocal inflection and facial expressions from other people, and so they sometimes react irrationally to emotional situations.

This stage will be followed by revisits to check their states of mind and progress reports. Undeniably, to plan prevention programs, there is a need to better understand students’ opinions of their educator’s language used in classrooms such as science, social studies, and math. Additionally, it is important to know adolescents’ views about their own listening behaviors. It is hypothesized that this type of information could provide new ideas to potentially use for prevention, intervention, and mentoring purposes. Findings might serve as one piece of information effecting positive rather than negative school outcomes for adolescents involved in violence. Though the data and findings will be from girls in trouble with the law and who have experienced school failure, it can serve many at-risk students struggling with the challenging demands of school.

Juvenile crime is one of the nation’s serious problems. Concern about it is widely shared by federal, state, and local government officials and by the public. In recent years, this concern has grown with the dramatic rise in juvenile violence that began in the mid-1980’s and peaked in the early 1990’s. Although juvenile crime rates appear to have fallen since the mid-1990’s, this decrease has not alleviated the concern. Many states began taking a tougher legislative stance toward juveniles in the late 1970’s and early 1980’s, a period during which juvenile crime rates were stable or falling slightly, and federal reformers were urging prevention and less punitive measures.

Research over the past few decades on normal child development and on development of delinquent behavior has shown that individual, social, and community conditions as well as their interactions influence behavior. There is general agreement that behavior, including antisocial and delinquent behavior, is the result of a complex interplay of individual biological and genetic factors and environmental factors, starting during fetal development and continuing throughout life Clearly, genes affect biological development, but there is no biological development without environmental input. Thus, both biology and environment influence behavior.

Conclusively, the entire project was an immense success with children learning not only to trust themselves and their surroundings again but also gaining a better and fair understanding of their future ahead. The team grew with the young adults, sharing experiences and laughter along with life lessons that only come from experience and self-reflection. A society where these kids aren’t ostracised but are loved and nurtured so that they can one day experience their fullest potential is the day that we, at House of Learning worked and will continue to work for.

Parents of teens often wonder what happened to the bright child they used to have. How can someone go from getting A’s to getting C’s when they seem to be doing the same amount of work? Once again, changes in the brain are to blame. While the merits of IQ tests are debatable, scientists used to think IQ stayed the same over one’s lifetime. Now it turns out that number can fluctuate widely in adolescence.

This makes sense biologically; why should your brain waste energy remembering things that aren’t very necessary to your day to day life? It’s one of the reasons that younger children can learn a second language much faster than adults; they have more synapses to store that information. And if they keep speaking that second language often enough, they will remember it the rest of their lives.

But if there is a subject they didn’t concentrate so hard on, like math, suddenly they start forgetting things they used to know because the brain is deleting that information.

As Mark Twain said, “When a child turns 12, he should be kept in a barrel and fed through the bung hole, until he reaches 16 … at which time you plug the bung hole.”

Presence of gadgets leads to absence of life.

Chronically irritable children are often in a state of abnormally high arousal, and may seem “wired and tired.”
Both parents and clinicians may be “barking up the wrong tree.” That is, they’re trying to treat what looks like a textbook case of irritability and apathy, but failing to rule out and address the most common environmental cause of such symptoms—everyday use of electronics. Time and again, I’ve realized that successfully treating a child requires methodically eliminating all electronics use for several weeks—an “electronics fast”—to allow the nervous system to “reset.”

Here’s a look at six physiological mechanisms that explain electronics’ tendency to produce mood disturbance:

1. Screen time disrupts sleep and desynchronizes the body clock.

Because light from screen devices mimics daytime, it suppresses melatonin, a sleep signal released by darkness. Once the body clock is disrupted, all sorts of other unhealthy reactions occur, such as hormonal imbalances and brain inflammation.

2. Screen time desensitizes the brain’s reward system.

Many children are “hooked” on electronics, and in fact gaming releases so much dopamine—the “feel-good” chemical—that on a brain scan it looks the same as cocaine use. Meanwhile, dopamine is also critical for focus and motivation, so needless to say, even small changes in dopamine sensitivity can wreak havoc on how well a child feels and functions.

3. Screen time produces “light-at-night.”

Light-at-night from electronics has been linked to depression and even suicide risk in numerous studies. Sometimes parents are reluctant to restrict electronics use in a child’s bedroom because they worry the child will enter a state of despair—but in fact removing light-at-night is protective.

4. Screen time induces stress reactions.

Both acute stress (fight-or-flight) and chronic stress produce changes in brain chemistry and hormones that can increase irritability. Additionally, both hyper arousal and addiction pathways suppress the brain’s frontal lobe, the area where mood regulation actually takes place.

5. Screen time overloads the sensory system, fractures attention, and depletes mental reserves.

Experts say that what’s often behind explosive and aggressive behavior is poor focus. By depleting mental energy with high visual and cognitive input, screen time contributes to low reserves.

6. Screen-time reduces physical activity levels and exposure to “green time.”

Research shows that time outdoors, especially interacting with nature, can restore attention, lower stress, and reduce aggression. Thus, time spent with electronics reduces exposure to natural mood enhancers.

In today’s world, it may seem crazy to restrict electronics so drastically. But when kids are struggling, we’re not doing them any favors by leaving electronics in place and hoping they can wind down by using electronics in “moderation.” In contrast, by allowing the nervous system to return to a more natural state with a strict fast, we can take the first step in helping a child become calmer, stronger, and happier.

#HouseOfLearning #SonalAhuja #EarlyChildhoodEducation #EarlyChildhood #EarlyYears #EarlyChildhoodEducator #Educator #Parenting #MindfulParenting #ParentingStyle #DigitalEra #Gadgets #Children

SPOUSE MANUAL…….

SPOUSE MANUAL………
Guess What?? It’s a two-way Article. Who so ever reads get to know the secrets.
Recognizing and Respecting Your Partner’s Actions and Boundaries

Being in a romantic relationship has many wonderful moments, and can be very fulfilling. It is not always easy, though, and sometimes requires a great deal of work. It can be difficult to learn to read your partners signals, spoken and unspoken. 

It is essential for a healthy relationship, however. Learning to recognize and respect your partnerís actions and boundaries is one of the most loving things you can do for them. Here is what you need to know about it.

Fight Fair

When you disagree with your partner on any issue, it is far too easy to get into an argument about the matter. Choose to fight fair. Don’t call your partnerís character into question, as this is a major violation of boundaries. Stick to the topic at hand and don’t launch a verbal assault on the other party.

Know When to Offer Advice

Be intuitive to your partner and know when they are seeking advice, or just want a listening ear. Offering advice should only be done when requested and should be given in the best interest of your partner. Be sensitive with your advice and be careful not to infringe on their thought process when they simply need you to listen to them.

Respect Their Need for Alone Time

Even when they are in a relationship with someone they love and admire, the need for alone time is big for some individuals. It doesn’t necessarily mean that the person doesn’t like being around you; it’s simply a need that must be respected. When you feel your partner is craving this kind of alone time, offer to take an evening off from each other in order to recharge.

Know When to Walk Away

When you are in an argument and things are getting heated, know when to back off. If you understand your partner, you will realize when things are getting to where both of you will regret the words that might be said next. If your partner walks away or says the conversation is over, choose to respectfully take a break.

Be a Good Student of Body Language

There is no better way to learn your partner’s actions and boundaries than to become an observant student of their body language. Take note of how they act when they are pleased with the situation, and when they are not. Know what signals to watch out for that would indicate they feel you have crossed the line. This will help you know how to fully support them.

Respect Their Words

No means no, and all other words have their own meaning too. When your partner has said something to you, respect it. Never try to push your own agenda in order to get your way. This will only damage the relationship and cause your partner to lose respect for you. Respect your partnerís words in the same way you expect your words to be respected.

Relationships can be tricky things. There seem to be many rules to follow, and these rules can change from one day to the next. One thing that never changes, though, is the need that every human has to have their actions and boundaries respected by their partner. Learn how to do this, and to recognize them even before being said. This will show your partner you care and will make for a healthy relationship that lasts many years.

TRY IT OUT AND YOU CAN REACH ME FOR MORE DISCUSSIONS ON THIS. I AM SURE WE ALL NEED THIS.

TEACHING PARENTS ABOUT PARENTING.

TEACHING PARENTS ABOUT PARENTING.

There is nothing in the world I feel more passionately about, than children, their education and parenting.

These by far have been my most meaningful endeavors. Having worked in the area of early childhood education for more than two decades, I have embraced the nuances of the field and yet, I discover something new each day!

For a long time now, my colleagues, family, and friends have been encouraging me to share my experiences, thoughts and work with the world, and so I decided to let my voice find a medium through this Article. It is not that I have not committed mistakes in my parenting, I did. Parenting has actually brought out the most intense emotions in me. I do not think anything in this world comes close to changing us as a person or our lives, as much as having children. My work is part of a tradition in psychology that shows the power of people beliefs. These may be beliefs we are aware or unaware of, but they unequivocally affect what we want and whether we succeed in achieving our goals. In this article, you will learn how a simple belief about yourself, guides a large part of your life.You will understand your mate, your boss, friends, and your children. You will see how to unleash your potential and your child’s too. Parenting is never about any kind of strategy but it is our philosophy of life in general. It is not about our children but it is

about us becoming more aware, mindful, sensitive and conscious human beings. I really believe that parenting hardly comes naturally to anybody. There are some parents seen, to be made for parenting- their patience, calmness and gentle presence sometimes is beyond belief. For the rest of us, we have to develop these skills and way of being through a lot of conscious effort. Therefore, I do believe, strongly, that parenting has to be inside out process. As parents, we are required to have the belief that we have to first work on ourselves. Whatever issues we might face with children, the question is not what the child needs to do at that point in time, but what we as parents need to reflect on or do .In case, if you are facing a difficulty with your child, simply ask yourself a few questions. How do I feel about it? How is that impacting my child? Is it my need or my child’s? What am I supposed to do as a parent? Now answer them with great transparency and you will exactly know what you are supposed to do.

Another fact about the children is that whatever we focus on, it grows in them. As a parent, if I focus on the child’s weaknesses, it is apparent that those weaknesses will grow. Therefore, it’s always good to work on the strengths of a child in order to initiate growth in that area in particular. Most commonly, this goes very much against the 

common parenting practice- the focus is more on irresponsible lifestyle and weak areas, hence we end up lecturing them, criticizing them for the wrong choices. The more we see the grey areas, the more we crank them up with our negativity. The need, therefore, is to accept children as they are and focus entirely on what they can actually

 do and are capable of. Definitely, children will do well if they are assured of their capabilities.

It is so obvious after seeing a little baby trying to walk. The baby takes small steps forward, looks at his caregivers 

with a beautiful smile, takes another step and then, maybe, falls down. Now imagine, if this baby is continuously guided, counseled, trained and also compared with other children who could walk, then what? I am sure the children lose interest in whatever they are doing. The child might give up and not want to put in efforts again. 

Not only this, we might end up thinking and tell that the child is lazy, or maybe doesn’t want to walk or maybe is tired. Sounds little weird isn’t it? I think it is the self-doubt, that is now stopping the child from keeping pace with

what the child was doing previously. Somehow, I have always been a little confused by a lot of parenting literature out there which aims at categorizing parents into pigeon holes on the basis of parenting tiles and as a result, we hear a lot about different styles of parenting: Permissive, laissez-faire, drill sergeant, helicopter, tiger mum, authoritarian,

authoritative, democratic etc. I have never known which style I fit into! Instead, I am really contented with my own style of parenting, with all its imperfections. It has been strangely interesting to give myself permission to be imperfect. There is no right or wrong way of parenting. If each child is wired and inspired differently, then each 

parent is wired and inspired differently too.

This article is not about making you a perfect parent so that you can have the perfect kids. This is a small effort that will make you feel that you have got a companion for you to reflect, introspect and dive deep to connect to the immense wealth of wisdom that is already there.

Always remember parenting is not about bringing up children. It is about growing up

and transforming, ourselves to be a better human being. It is not about being there FOR

the children but it is exclusively about being there WITH the children.

I see so many examples in my daily schedule, where we as parents keep reminding ourselves that we are here for our children and as a consequence, we really skip being with them.

 It was a great day at my school and It was the ideal opportunity for youngsters to leave for home. A mother, who had come to get her girl, came to me with her little girl and asked, “What influences you to work with kids, what influences you ‘to talk’ to them”. I was going to state my standard answer, “Since I cherish them”.

However abruptly the girl pulled her mom’s dress and stated, “Mamma lets go”. The woman swung to her tyke and in an abrupt voice condemned her, “wouldn’t you be able to see I am conversing with ma’am, how frequently have I told you not to hinder me when I am conversing with anybody, awful behavior”. 

It was at that exact second that I understood that it was not ‘love’ that influenced us to work with kids, but rather it was Regard. On the off chance that I was in the mother’s place, I would have reacted with, -“Indeed, dear, you should be ravenous, I will hustle just a bit with your ma’am” or something comparative.

I would have regarded the youngster needs. Similarly, as I might want others to regard my requirements. Do you mind if a youngster irritates you when you are accomplishing something, yet in the meantime you discover it is flawlessly alright that you burst in when the child is accomplishing something? Do you frequently feel that it is imperative that we control kids, yet it isn’t worthy when youngsters endeavor to control our circumstance? Some places, we are working on a same platform while other some places we think that we are up here and our kids are down there. That is the reason we believe that they should be controlled, told, chastened, and rebuffed.

In some places, we think we are predominant; we know increasingly and subsequently well of the need to ‘drive them’. Yet, what might happen in the event that we think about them as equivalents. What will happen in the event that we approached them with deference, worked with them as though they are as equivalent to us? What are we going to get if we somehow happened to give regard?

However, some places whereby the minute I regarded to the child, the child feels regarded. A kid who feels regarded is considerably more open to tuning in, to comprehend, to take after (the correct things), to participate and to improve things. Envision how it might be in a place where we are not regarded when contrasted with a place where we seem to be? 

Clearly, the youngster will think, feel and act better. Also, we will be in an ideal situation as well! In the event that you lead through dread you will have little regard; however, in the event that you lead through

regard, you will have little to fear.